Entry Level 8 - "Godzilla ALMOST Got it Right"

Hello again all you out there!!

I thought a little controversy would kick this one off nicely. A little racist maybe, but I hope to make it work.

When I say Godzilla ALMOST got it right, I am referring to some of the bizarre and way-passed-the-line material we get from the orient in the game industry. First, allow me to introduce some of you to the doctrine of gaming both in the East and West. I am confident these doctrines both came from the East, but part of me kinda likes them.

Western Games have the 3 Rs:
Realism (Graphics)
Rockets (Action, explosions, guns)
Rights (Licensing, sports)

Eastern Games have the 3Fs:
Freedom
Fun
Fantasy

So, you look at Eastern and Western games and you CAN see how this statement has been composed and validated, HOWEVER...



Seriously though... Thanks!

Yes, I will admit that the Western world gave us Manhunt, Black, and will be giving us Bulletstorm, and YES the Eastern world gave us Bayonetta, Final Fantasy 7 (and 7 ONLY!), and Super Mario Galaxy. There are more examples, but I am trimming for time's sake. Each region has offered some of the finest products I might ever see.

But then I look deeper into the world of Eastern video games and things just get wierder and wierder and wierder...



So lets start at the "Freedom". Now they appear to take the word freedom, strip it down, strap it to a chair and ensure that it goes absolutely nowhere in case criticism might head their way. Like right now. I do think it iss necessary when you look at their idea of gender identity. Everytime I look at a game that has been conjured up by Square Enix or someone, their dudes look like chicks and their chicks look... well I don't know. They look like 10 year olds whose bodies have developed at warp speed. It creeps me the fuck out. The idea of freedom stretches all the way to making games about being a rapist. Oh yeah, they went there. I actually came across (BY ACCIDENT) a game where you were supposedly a lesbian who would take girls home then wait, WAIT till they fell asleep and then would have all these tricks and tools to try and make her orgasm without waking up... I never could but that's not the point! They really do have freedom chained to a chair. I once heard a quote from someone saying, "Rape is how they say hello is Japan". Brilliant.

Fantasy and fun sure do play their part in it all as well. Oh yeah, FUN. I remember that. Sonic was fun. Streets of Rage 2 was fun. Devil May Cry 3? Final Fantasy 13?!?!? No no no nononononononono. Not fun. What, pray tell, is FUN about playing 20 hours (20 HOURS) of a game only to find it has only just begun? Are you kidding me? Hey, that iPad you bought, it's pretty cool, but you have to play around with that one button for a full day before you can download any apps. Fuck off!! If that is their idea of fun, I am actually curious to find out what they find dull. Only for a second though... no wonder they think karaoke is the world's greatest piece of social entertainment. For shame.

I think a break is necessary though. Reading this back, I feel as though I am releasing some sort of racist, homophobic, hillbilly, which is only actually happens when the Stella Artois touches my lips. All I have had tonight is a couple of Heinekens and a bottle of Brentwood Brewing Company's Clockwork Orange. Anyway, I digress.

20 hours in the car... nothing

Freedom... Fun... yes Fantasy, now to be honest I do not have a lot to say here. I have had my affair with fantasy games, and some I have genuinely enjoyed. I think perhaps the previous rants I have had almost culminate into fantasy games well so in that context I agree with them almost (oh no! I'm contradicting myself!), but then a spanner gets thrown in the works. My biggest issue with it becomes the context itself. Consistency. All I ask of games is consistency. Unless that is exactly what a developer explicitly wants to destory and mess with. Not eastern, but Indigo Prophecy (Fahrenheit) is the best example my inebriation can generate. One minute you are in the middle of a crime and trying to prove yourself innocent, the next you are being harrassed by giant cockroaches and ghostly angels.... get out. In Bayonetta, your hair turns into your special power, and while executing these, your character is naked.... get out.

The 3 Fs? Freedom fucked fun. That is my new take on it. And fantasy is being dragged down with it.

I may have lost some readers here, but those of you who are still going, I salute you. I would have left this page by now. So good for you!

NEXT WEEK: "The 3 Rs - Reproduce, Repeat, Recoil"

If you have anything you wish to share with me or indeed the readers, feel free to comment or e-mail me at twentyfiveand0@hotmail.co.uk - Don't forget to check out the What Have I Been Playing pages found on the right! OR Check out my channel at www.youtube.com/ike1luv